Stigmatized grief: Experiences of gay Israeli men with pregnancy loss via international surrogacy

The increasing phenomenon of gay fatherhood through surrogacy has garnered significant academic interest, with most research focusing on motivations for choosing surrogacy as a path to parenthood. However, no study to date has examined the experiences of pregnancy loss among gay men using surrogacy. This study aims to explore the experiences of Israeli gay fathers who pursued gestational surrogacy abroad and faced pregnancy loss. Through thematic analysis of interviews with 11 Israeli gay men, three key themes emerged: (a) Pregnancy Loss at a Distance: Struggling with Control; (b) Bodies and Bonds: My Feelings, My Baby, Her Body, Her Feelings; and (c) Paying the Price: Financial Strains of Pregnancy Loss. The findings suggest that participants' grief is both disenfranchized and stigmatized, manifesting on structural and interpersonal levels. The need for greater societal awareness and important practical implications for mental health professionals working with LGBTQ+ parents who endure pregnancy loss are outlined.